Marinerds, etc.

So I'm listening to this insane Braves-Astros game on the radio, and idly looking around the Mariners roster, and as the game gets more and more insane (I've been listening since the 8th inning, and we're now cusping the 18th. Who was that masked man and what did he do with the real Kyle Farnsworth?), to distract myself I notice that some Mariners have some pretty wacky middle names. Therefore, I will share with you, in the form of a multiple-choice quiz! If you're also a roster junkie like me, this'll be pretty easy. I'm too lazy to go write a cgi-thingy to score it or anything, so hopefully the "cut" tag will work and hide the answers.

1. My middle name is NOT Allan/Allen/Alan/etc:

a. Gil Meche
b. Jeff Nelson
c. Dan Wilson
d. Dave Hansen

2. My middle name is as long as my first and last names combined:

a. Jose Lopez
b. Greg Dobbs
c. Jeremy Reed
d. Mike Morse

3. My full name is NOT 24 letters long:

a. Chris Snelling
b. Wiki Gonzalez
c. Richie Sexson
d. George Sherrill

4. I have the shortest middle name on the team (of those that have them listed):

a. Ryan Franklin
b. Raul Ibanez
c. Willie Bloomquist
d. Julio Mateo

5. Bucky Jacobsen's real full name is:

a. Larry Paul Jacobsen
b. Larry William Jacobsen
c. Larry Bucknell Jacobsen
d. Larry Doyle Jacobsen

6. J.J.Putz's real full name is:

a. Julian Jeremy Putz
b. Joseph Jason Putz
c. John Jason Putz
d. John Jacob Jingleheimer Putz

7. This 2005 Tacoma Rainiers player actually goes by their middle name:

a. Hunter Brown
b. Ryan Christianson
c. Damian Moss
d. Aaron Rifkin

8. Complete the chain: Clinton Scott Nageotte -> Scott Edward Spiezio ->Edward _______ Guardado ->

a. Joel Pineiro
b. Adrian Beltre
c. Miguel Ojeda
d. Ichiro Suzuki

Answers...

Answers:

1 - d. David Andrew Hansen

2 - a. Jose Celestino Lopez, not Gregory Stuart Dobbs, Jeremy Thomas Reed, or Michael John Morse.

3 - c. Richmond Lockwood Sexson, which only comes out to 22 letters, as opposed to Christopher Doyle Snelling, Wiklenman Vicente Gonzalez, or George Friederich Sherrill.

4 - a. Ryan Ray Franklin (3), as opposed to William Paul Bloomquist (4), Julio Cesar Mateo (5), or Raul Javier Ibanez (6).

5 - b. Larry William Jacobsen; his dad is Larry Laverne Jacobsen, not to be confused with Larry Paul Jacobson, the NFL star.

6 - b. Joseph Jason Putz

7 - a. Andrew Hunter Brown. I don't really blame him, with such a common name.

8 - b. Edward Adrian Guardado -> Adrian Perez Beltre