bowandbrush:

sugarcoatednightshade:

fanonical:

not wanting to be outdone by the benders in the gang, sokka invents the flamethrower, the supersoaker, the leaf blower, and the concept of throwing rocks at people

this is canon. to me.

wait did anyone draw this already

roadhogsbigbelly:

roadhogsbigbelly:

roadhogsbigbelly:

roadhogsbigbelly:

i think it’s really funny when formally fat people go “body positivity is a scam because when i was fat i was miserable and i hated myself but now that i’m skinny i feel alot happier” and it’s like well that’s because society treats fat people like subhuman dogshit for daring to breathe in public and treats skinniness as the pinicle of human excellence, so i think that’s the reason you aren’t as depressed maybe.

“formally fat” and “detrans” people have alot in common in the sense they project their insecurities of their former identities onto other fat/trans people and blame them for their misery as if the only reason they detransed/decided to lose weight wasn’t because they were relentlessly bullied and oppressed for years by a society that values strict gender roles and beauty standards, and because they decided to crack to those standards they think the issue is with everyone else.

and obviously this doesn’t apply to EVERYONE they are like. detrans people who don’t project their issues with their identity onto other trans people, or formally fat people who don’t treat losing weight like beating cancer, but those aren’t the people trending on twitter for “being one of the good ones who overcame’ or whatever.

oh i am going to kill myself

FAT PEOPLE IN FORMAL WEAR I AM SO FUCKING SORRY I LOVE YALL

psychicbirdstarlight:

deadbeatescape:

grimblo-goblin:

ysabelmystic:

robotlyra:

lostinhistory:

lostinhistory:

It is possible that somewhere off the coast of Newfoundland there is an iceberg shaped like a giant dick.

IT’S REAL

AND THE PHOTOGRAPHER COMES FROM DILDO, NEWFOUNDLAND

ITS REAL

Mr. Pretty from Dildo, Newfoundland photographed a Giant Penis Shaped Iceberg

IN CONCEPTION BAY

This reads like an article in the postillion

jellogram:

On my first day in Germany I got to my hotel and I couldn’t get the lights to turn on. And I was like “Eh, fuck it, I’ll just take a shower in the dark.” And then the shower wouldn’t get hot. I waited and waited and it stayed ice cold.

So I go down to the front desk and I’m like “My lights won’t turn on and my shower won’t get hot” so they send this guy up with me. We get into the room and I flick the switch and nothing happens so I’m like “See?”

And he goes “You must put your card in the slot.”

“I… what? I have to put my room card in the light switch?”

“Of course!”

Now I have been in many hotels in the US and never encountered this concept, but apparently it was something most of their guests already knew. So I’m looking like a fool at this point. I feel like an idiot. The dude is fully grinning at me. I put the card in the slot and voila, the light turns on.

Then he’s like “Ok, let’s see if the shower works. You know you must wait for the hot water?” and I just know he’s thinking I’m an idiot who also can’t use a shower. This stupid American can’t wait for the hot water! She can’t even use a light switch or a shower!

And I guess he was distracted by these thoughts of my stupidity, because this dude fully stepped into the shower. In his nice dress shirt and slacks. He just. Gets into the shower.

And turns it on.

Have you ever seen a playing field get leveled instantaneously

navigatorwrongway:

shadowbrightshine:

homunculus-argument:

There were probably some medieval asexuals that were absolutely insufferable on their moral high horse about it. Like “this modesty shit easy - I haven’t lusted over any man ever in my life and only fuck my husband out of duty from God and only so that we have children. I am so much better than any of you hoes.”

And some other local goodwife would get sick of this and go “well obviously you don’t have time for cock, Maergaret, since you’re always too fucking busy choking on your own vanity and pride!” and have a smackfight that progresses into a full-on two-woman brawl in the town square. People gather around to watch this until a clergyman shows up to remind everyone that not only is this kind of brawl between good christians definitely a sin, it’s also a sin for everyone who’s watching to place bets on who’s going to win.

This made me choke on my milk

Everyone entertained by this post PLEASE consider reading or listening to “How to Behave Badly in Elizabethan England: A Guide for Knaves, Fools, Harlots, Cuckolds, Drunkards, Liars, Thieves, and Braggarts” by Ruth Goodman it’s such a good look into how the culture of insults and politeness have changed over time and includes probably a dozen (??) actual incidents very like this^ and has legitimately some of the BEST strings of insults I’ve ever encountered, courtesy of a slew of Tudor and Stuart-era shitslingers

thankyouforthefunny:

ri-writing:

koboldspucke:

fluffycakesistainted:

quiet-but-not-blind:

…Lizzy

#this is so freaking funny (itspileofgoodthings)

#adaptations really do often underplay how much#pride and prejudice#darcy’s ‘unexpected’ proposal#is basically the ‘did you just flirt with me’ ‘have been for the past [few months] but thanks for noticing’ meme#like this scene#or the one where Lizzy and him are ALONE in the Collins’ house talking about women marrying and moving far from home#& he’s trying to suss out whether she’d be cool with marrying him and living far away from her own home#and she is like ‘well obviously it’s fine if you have enough money to afford the travel’ and he’s like ‘oh?!? and uhhh…#you’re not super attached to your home yourself are you? like you’d be fine with not constantly visiting [your weird embarrassing family]?’#SHE IS SO CLUELESS

This is why I always say that Pride & Prejudice is not Enemies To Lovers.

Elizabeth is in a one-sided-enemies to lovers story. The book from Elizabeth’s point of view:
Darcy: [compliments her]
Elizabeth: This man is insulting me.
Darcy: [gets up his nerve and asks her to dance after she makes a big deal of liking dancing]
Elizabeth: He is trying to make me feel uncomfortable!
Darcy: [tries to make conversation about something he thinks she is interested in]
Elizabeth: I’m not sure what his angle is, but it must be awful since he said that one unflattering thing about me to his friend in a conversation I eavesdropped on! And also, hot!George says he’s an ass, so clearly him being nice to me must be nefarious!!!

Darcy, meanwhile, is over here in all his awkwardness thinking he’s doing a really good job of flirting with the girl he likes. He’s doing so well. It’s actually working! At first it seemed too good to be true, but she’s saying all the right things! She’s telling him how to meet up with her so they can spend time together! She’s putting up with his awful aunt and still lets him visit her despite all of that! He’s done it! He’s got the girl! He’s planning their wedding because he’s getting an A in romance, you guys.

derinthescarletpescatarian:

derinthescarletpescatarian:

scumbagsblog:

ALT

where’s that masterpost of quotes that have no right going as hard as they do. I’d like to submit “Protagonism is best left to teens and the insane”

Every time I consider making a sandwich I think of this fucking tweet.

The stupid thing is that it puts me in the mindset of being an NPC looking forward to a balanced, delicious, good-looking sandwich, instead of some vegemite half-heartedly smeared between a couple of bits of bread. So now I’m like “well if my goal is Sandwich, it should be a good sandwich”. I mean it’s gotta look good in the thought bubble right? Some guy wandering around in a computer game would be imagining a picture of a ham and cheese toastie AT MINIMUM, probably with tomato and some greens in there. Possibly he’d imagine a full on sub sandwich.

I have started putting actual effort into making tastier, prettier sandwiches. Because of this fucking tweet.

#tricked into eating healthy by autism wanting the meme to be happy

Okay listen,

my-gender-is-5-bucks-and-a-d20:

cookinguptales:

this is all I’m talking about until halloween sorry i don’t make the rules

queenofzan:

I think Amanda fully believed she and Sarek were dating for weeks or months before he realized that she thought that.

Like, Sarek is thinking he’s doing SUCH a good job in Human Diplomacy, he has made A Human Friend. They do activities together, consume meals together, communicate outside of work functions in an informal fashion. Amanda makes an effort to show him Human culture and landmarks that are more likely to appeal to a Vulcan and is considerate of his different physiology in a way most Humans usually forget to be. She doesn’t touch him without warning but still somehow uses body language to convey to other Humans that they are together on their activities. She gives him lots of signs of Human comfort and intimacy without pushing too hard at his Vulcan boundaries. He’s Succeeding at Human socializing!

Meanwhile Amanda has like. Introduced him to her parents. Taken him to friends’ weddings. Done super obvious This Is A Date activities with him, only tailored to accomodate Vulcan preferences about physical contact and emotional displays. SHE thinks she is doing So Good at Wooing The Vulcan. Sometimes he willingly touches her when they are out in public, to like, keep them from getting separated, or pull her out of the path of danger or discomfort, which as far as she knows is like Vulcan First Base.

But also she is a Human woman they have been dating for months and taking it slow for her Vulcan beau is beginning to grow…somewhat frustrating! A little! Like she enjoys spending time with him but also! She would sure like to touch him more! Maybe kiss him! She would even settle for feeling up his hands the way Vulcans do because she has gotten so preoccupied with his hands since they’ve been dating, she feels like a 19th century maiden, it’s insane.

So she casually broaches the subject of whether or not Vulcans engage in sexual activity outside of Pon Farr (when they’re having a quiet evening alone in one of their apartments, obviously, you don’t have a sex talk with your very shy boyfriend in public) and Sarek is like. Well that’s a very intimate topic, Amanda, why do you ask? Is there a Vulcan you are interested in pursuing a romantic relationship with?

And she’s just like What.

And he’s like (gently condescending) That sort of question could imply a “come-on”, as you Humans would say.

And she’s like I SURE HOPE IT WOULD, SAREK, MY BOYFRIEND OF SIX MONTHS, WITH WHOM I WOULD LIKE TO BE PHYSICALLY INTIMATE

And Sarek is like WHAT.