MARIO KART 9 RETRO PREDICTIONS!

That's right! Ever since like, a month ago, we've received official confirmation that we're getting a new Mario Kart game that isn't Mario Kart Tour! Rejoice!

Yes, it's an exciting time to be a Mario Kart fan. After all, a new game means new courses, new drivers, new items, new gameplay mechanics, and all that jazz! I mean, 24-player races in the fantastical world of Utah? That's some exciting stuff!

But almost just as exciting as the new courses are the new old courses, especially when considering how much Mario Kart 8 spruced them up! Also, it's just way easier to to predict returning courses than new courses. Look: I don't have a time machine shaped like a crystal ball. I could say "Oh yeah, Mario Kart 9 will definitely have a new course called Toad's Wastewater Treatment Plant," but I'd just be making that up. I don't have a source! I can't show you the bibliography! I'm sorry.

Not that I can completely accurately predict retro courses either. Look, I can be as methodical as I please, but I don't work at Nintemdo. We know next to nothing about this game, so all my predictions are really just shots in the dark here! But it's fun to load a gun and haphazardly shoot bullets in a cave! Who knows! Maybe we'll end up shooting some of the retro courses that will be in Mario Kart 9!

My dearest condolences to Toad's Factory.

Retro predictions begin under the cut!

THE PROPHECY IS TRUE

"I'll se you in 5 years!" WHU-... OMG, IT HAS BEEN 5 YEARS, HASN'T IT??!?!?

get this an oscar

gf_15_Trim.mp4

a strawman would be a great friend to call on if i had lots and lots of drinks

https://www.blutonews.org/article/12

APRIL 30, 2024

bluto waoted his turn today when he was waiting in line and popeye was in front of him. he usually doesnt like pooeye but today he was really polite and touched his fingers together and smiled

Compulsive Wario impressions

ok so I've done a custom remix of why don't you like our song title from let's make a music vol 2 and dr brims from let's make a music vol 1. so the logical next step is to pick a song from let's make a music vol 3 to make another custom remix of right? in which case,

Gay gay gay

The one about Forklifts

Looks like it's been a powered industrial minute since I made one of these, huh?

Full video with captions here!

I've talked before about the strangeness of the ICZN's official recommendations for assigning a latin grammatical gender to non-latin genus-group names but I'm legitimately considering writing a formal request to have them either change or clarify those rules. like why on earth does it say "a noun having a gender in a modern European language (without having to be transliterated from a non-Latin alphabet into the Latin alphabet)". that is so needlessly specific

the genus name of an animal is treated like a latin noun, and species names are given suffixes like they're latin adjectives so in order to know what suffixes a species name can use you have to know what gender the genus name is.

you can sometimes just use the gender from the source language, but the ICZN explicitly defines several cases where you don't do that, which include:

The rule about non-Latin alphabets is dumb. But I think part of the reason it's there is that people outside of linguistics seem to treat writing as the base/true form of a language. So they treat the letters as being the gender suffix of a word rather than the sound segments. And from that perspective it makes more sense how other writing systems can be viewed as incompatible with the Latin. And the exception for Greek is just because there are so many Greek names you sort of have to include them I guess.

there's certainly some sort of logic to it, it's just that from a linguistic perspective it's really weird to act as though (for example) polish is in some way more compatible with latin grammar than ukrainian on the grounds of the writing system alone

I've talked before about the strangeness of the ICZN's official recommendations for assigning a latin grammatical gender to non-latin genus-group names but I'm legitimately considering writing a formal request to have them either change or clarify those rules. like why on earth does it say "a noun having a gender in a modern European language (without having to be transliterated from a non-Latin alphabet into the Latin alphabet)". that is so needlessly specific

the genus name of an animal is treated like a latin noun, and species names are given suffixes like they're latin adjectives so in order to know what suffixes a species name can use you have to know what gender the genus name is.

you can sometimes just use the gender from the source language, but the ICZN explicitly defines several cases where you don't do that, which include:

if an eastern european zoologist gives a genus a name borrowed from some grammatically feminine serbo-croatian noun, explicitly stating that it's meant to be serbo-croatian but not saying what gender the name is supposed to have (thus letting the default rules apply), the rules outlined by the ICZN imply that future species discovered in this genus have to have names that are feminine if and only if serbo-croatian counts as a modern european language that natively uses the latin alphabet, but otherwise it would default to masculine.

I cannot imagine the organization that thinks banning people from naming a beetle after hitler would be too political would have a sensible resolution to this naming conflict if it ever happens.

what could he have meant by this?

I've talked before about the strangeness of the ICZN's official recommendations for assigning a latin grammatical gender to non-latin genus-group names but I'm legitimately considering writing a formal request to have them either change or clarify those rules. like why on earth does it say "a noun having a gender in a modern European language (without having to be transliterated from a non-Latin alphabet into the Latin alphabet)". that is so needlessly specific

the genus name of an animal is treated like a latin noun, and species names are given suffixes like they're latin adjectives so in order to know what suffixes a species name can use you have to know what gender the genus name is.

you can sometimes just use the gender from the source language, but the ICZN explicitly defines several cases where you don't do that, which include:

if an eastern european zoologist gives a genus a name borrowed from some grammatically feminine serbo-croatian noun, explicitly stating that it's meant to be serbo-croatian but not saying what gender the name is supposed to have (thus letting the default rules apply), the rules outlined by the ICZN imply that future species discovered in this genus have to have names that are feminine if and only if serbo-croatian counts as a modern european language that natively uses the latin alphabet, but otherwise it would default to masculine.

I cannot imagine the organization that thinks banning people from naming a beetle after hitler would be too political would have a sensible resolution to this naming conflict if it ever happens.

also why european languages specifically? they're not the only ones to have grammatical gender (arabic, for instance) and this just feels needlessly eurocentric.

also, for languages with animate/inanimate (or common/neuter), i'm guessing inanimate corresponds to latin neuter, but what about animate/common?

while we're at it, i want the ICZN to make a conversion table between atlantic-congo noun classes and latin grammatical genders.

I've talked before about the strangeness of the ICZN's official recommendations for assigning a latin grammatical gender to non-latin genus-group names but I'm legitimately considering writing a formal request to have them either change or clarify those rules. like why on earth does it say "a noun having a gender in a modern European language (without having to be transliterated from a non-Latin alphabet into the Latin alphabet)". that is so needlessly specific

the genus name of an animal is treated like a latin noun, and species names are given suffixes like they're latin adjectives so in order to know what suffixes a species name can use you have to know what gender the genus name is.

you can sometimes just use the gender from the source language, but the ICZN explicitly defines several cases where you don't do that, which include:

if an eastern european zoologist gives a genus a name borrowed from some grammatically feminine serbo-croatian noun, explicitly stating that it's meant to be serbo-croatian but not saying what gender the name is supposed to have (thus letting the default rules apply), the rules outlined by the ICZN imply that future species discovered in this genus have to have names that are feminine if and only if serbo-croatian counts as a modern european language that natively uses the latin alphabet, but otherwise it would default to masculine.

I cannot imagine the organization that thinks banning people from naming a beetle after hitler would be too political would have a sensible resolution to this naming conflict if it ever happens.