Uncertainty is a ubiquitous, yet often misunderstood condition studied by academia. In the humanities, subjects wield it as a tool, using it as a source of inspiration and entertainment. In the social sciences, subjects consider it a weapon that, when controllable, is leveraged for competitive advantage and, when not, is defended against to minimize harm. We describe the dangers of its misunderstanding—specifically, those arising from mistaking untreatable uncertainties as treatable ones and vice versa. We draw from the analysis of these uses and misuses of uncertainty to make a call to action to improve how we study and address this unique condition that makes strategic decisions so much harder to optimize.