Slap Shot
Slap Shot is a 1977 film about a failing ice hockey team that finds success with outrageously violent hockey goonery.
- Directed by George Roy Hill. Written by Nancy Dowd.
Slap Shot out slaps... out swears... out laughs... (taglines)
Reggie Dunlop
[edit]- Jesus Christ, what a fuckin' nightmare.
- I'd like to place a personal bounty on the head of Tim McCracken. He's the coach and chief punk on that Syracuse team.
- [baiting the opposing goalie from behind the net] Hey, Hanrahan! Hanrahan!...Hey, Hanrahan! Suzanne sucks pussy!...Hey, Hanrahan, she's a dyke! I know! I know!...She's a lesbian! A lesbian! A lesbian!
The Hanson Brothers
[edit]- Well Reg is our coach.
Yeah, sure, Old Time Hockey!
Like Eddie Shore.
Eddie Shore, yeah.
Coach... our line starts? - [to Ogie Ogilthorpe] Hi, Ogie! Buy ya a soda after the game?
- Hey ya think they show Speed Racer here?
Others
[edit]- Ned Braden: You take the van, I'll keep the dog.
- Jim Carr: I may be bald, but at least I'm not chicken-shit!
- Denis Lemieux: [discussing hockey rules and customs, in broken English] Icing 'appen when dee puck come down... Bang! You know... before dee udder guy. Nobody dere. My h'arm go comme ça, den dee game stop den start h'up.
- Denis Lemieux: My h'allergy to those fucking fans, you know, has returned.
Dialogue
[edit]- Reggie Dunlop: How's it going, Nick?
- Nick Brophy: I'm drunk.
- Reggie Dunlop: Nah.
- Nick Brophy: I'm not bullshittin' ya. Got stinkin' shit-faced on the bus, Louise left me, and that son of a bitch over there keeps playin' me, when he knows I'm shit-faced.
- Reggie Dunlop: Geez, I'm really sorry.
- Nick Brophy: Anybody throws me against the boards, I'm gonna piss all over myself.
- Reggie Dunlop: What are you guys doing?
- Steve Hanson: Puttin' on the foil!
- Jeff Hanson: Every game!
- Jack Hanson: Yeah, you want some?
- [Following a pre-game brawl instigated by the Hanson brothers, during the National Anthem]
- Referee: I got my eye on the three of you. You pull one thing, you're out of this game. I run a clean game here. I have any trouble here, I'll suspend you–
- Steve Hanson: I'M LISTENING TO THE FUCKING SONG!
- [After the Chiefs win on a forfeit after Reggie baited the opposing goalie into a fight, when the opponent had no other goalies available]
- Mo Wanchuk: Hey, Reg! Reg! What did you say to him?
- Reggie Dunlop: I told him his wife was a dyke.
- Mo Wanchuk: NO!
- Reggie Dunlop: Yeah!
- Mo Wanchuk: Fuuuck!
- Jim Mahern: Jesus Christ, no wonder he flipped his lid.
- Johnny Upton: Anybody called my old lady a dyke, I'd go fucking bananas!
- Reggie Dunlop: His wife is a dyke!
- [Chiefs fashion show]
- Jim Ahern: I look like some cock-sucking faggot in this thing.
- Joe McGrath: Have you seen Reg or Braden?
- Jim Ahern: Joe, I don't care man. Enough is enough. Nowhere in my contract does it say I gotta make a fool out of myself. Am I right?
- [McGrath walks toward Upton]
- Joe McGrath: Have you seen Dunlop or Braden–
- Johnny Upton: I'm gonna flash 'em, Joe!
- Joe McGrath: Aw, now, son...
- Johnny Upton: I'm gonna walk down that stinkin' aisle, I'm gonna open up this faggot bathrobe and wiggle my dick at 'em!
- Joe McGrath: You will not.
- Johhny Upton: Yes I am, Joe, and you know why? Because I want you to have a heart attack and die so that we never have to do this shit again. You and your fucking fashion shows.
- Joe McGrath: It's good publicity! You boys just haven't been bringing in the crowds like you used to.
- Johnny Upton: I'm gonna wiggle it at 'em, you cheap bastard. I'm telling you, ya better be prepared, because when I yank it out, everybody in that audience with the exception of my wife is gonna be runnin' for the exits!
- [Upton storms out]
- Announcer: Ensemble #8, as we watch Chiefs defenseman, Johnny Upton, modelling #8...
- Joe McGrath: [on the phone] Joe McGrath, just checking on Dunlop–
- [The audience can be heard screaming at Upton, who apparently flashed the crowd; McGrath slowly hangs the phone up]
- Reggie Dunlop: You guys triplets or something?
- Jack Hanson: Nah, I am in the middle... Steve's 20 and Jeff's 18.
- Reggie Dunlop: Where ya from?
- Jack Hanson: Iron League.
- Reggie Dunlop: The Iron League, huh? Lotta fights?
- Jack Hanson: Nah... Hey I want a a soda.
- Reggie Dunlop: We paid for you here for a week then you gotta find a room of your own.
- Jack Hanson: Okay, coach. Gimme a grape or an orange and none of that stinkin' root beer.
- [after meeting the Hansons]
- Reggie Dunlop: You cheap son of a bitch. Are you crazy? Those guys are retards!
- McGrath: I got a good deal on those boys. Scout said they showed a lot of promise.
- Reggie Dunlop: They brought their fuckin' toys with 'em!
- McGrath: I'd rather have them playing with their toys than playing with themselves.
- Reggie Dunlop: They're too dumb to play with themselves! Boy, every piece of garbage that comes into the league, you gotta buy it.
- McGrath: Reg... Reg, that reminds me, I was coaching in Omaha in 1948 and Eddie Shore sends me this guy who's a terrible masturbator. Couldn't control himself. He would get deliberate penalities so he could get all by himself in the penalty box, and damned if he wouldn't, you know... [pantomimes masturbation]
- Reggie Dunlop: [disgusted] Aw, Jesus, Joe...
- McGrath: Now what was that again...? [continues masturbating gestures]
- Reggie Dunlop: She underlines the fuck scenes for ya? Jesus, if she underlines the fuck scenes for ya, she must worship the ground you walk on.
- Ned Braden: They teach you how to underline in college.
- Reggie Dunlop: Not the fuck scenes, they don't. Braden, you gotta learn to put out more, you know what I mean?
- Reggie Dunlop: You know, your son looks like a fag to me. You better get married again, 'cause he's gonna wind up with somebody's cock in his mouth before you can say "Jack Robinson".
- Anita McCambridge: How dare you. How DARE you!
- Johnny Upton: They're horrible looking.
- Reggie Dunlop: Don't look at me; it was McGrath's doing, not mine.
- Johnny Upton: What the old man trade for these assholes, a used puck bag? Watch Braden, he's gonna do something.
- Ned Braden: Hi. Are you guys brothers?
- Johnny Upton: Are you guys brothers... [laughs] What a life!
- Tim McCracken: Dunlop, you suck cock.
- Reggie Dunlop: All I can get.
- Joe McGrath: You can't put a bounty on a man's head.
- Reggie Dunlop: I just did.
- Reggie Dunlop: Let 'em know you're there! Get that stick in their side, let 'em know you're there! Put some lumber in their teeth, let 'em know you're there!
- Ned Braden: [sarcastically] Bleed all over 'em, let 'em know you're there.
- Reggie Dunlop: Lard ass Barkley Donaldson. You all saw what happened. Stick down, gloves off, he challenged the Chiefs. Called us names, CALLED US NAMES! But Dave was there.
- The Hansons: [in unison] Dave's a killer!
- Johnny Upton: Dave's a mess...
- Reggie Dunlop: But Dave's out. Who's gonna take his place?
- Ned Braden: Is the answer Jesus?
- Reggie Dunlop: [glares at Braden] Okay, guys. [looks directly to the Hansons] Show us what you got!
- [The Chiefs play normal, less raucous hockey in the championship game, only to get hammered in the first period ]
- Joe McGrath: They've come tonight.. to scout the Chiefs, the toughest team in the Federal League. Not this... bunch of... pussies. [stomps out of locker room]
- Reggie Dunlop: Scouts?
- [The Chiefs immediately return to their violent style of play]
Taglines
[edit]- Slap Shot out slaps... out swears... out laughs...
- you'll see Paul Newman doing things you'd never expect him to do... saying things you'd never expect him to say!
- If this movie doesn't make you laugh, you better look up a psychiatric!!
Cast
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