There comes a time in every long-term relationship when things start to seem a little too comfortable. You know the feeling: The honeymoon period is over, the bathroom door is closing less and less, and suddenly there’s a lot more time spent watching Love Is Blind in silence than there is dancing and romancing. At that moment, you may experience the urge to admit defeat and surrender to the impending roommate-ship. And don’t get me wrong, we love platonic roommates who binge-watch exploitative reality television with us! But I’m guessing you didn’t enter into a relationship with your significant other only to act like buddies with a few shared interests.
If you’re worried that your emotional intimacy with your girlfriend/wife/partner is waning, it’s probably a good idea to start investing more quality time in the relationship. Sitting down with your loved one and giving them your full attention is a great way to deepen your bond and keep that pesky little spark alive. Does it take a lot of effort? Absolutely. Is it hard? Duh! But in case you need some help, here are 55 questions to ask to strengthen your relationship and prove to your partner that you’re in it for the long haul.
1. What did you want to grow up to do when you were 5? What about 15? How about now?
2. Who was your earliest crush?
3. What’s the most out-of-character thing you’ve ever done?
4. How do you feel about surprise parties?
5. Do you believe in astrology?
6. What are you most scared of that is least likely to happen?
7. How do you feel about Taylor Swift?
8. What was your favorite book to be read when you were a kid?
9. What was the most embarrassing thing that happened to you in school?
10. Did you like high school or college better?
11. If you had to get rid of one color forever, what would it be?
12. What is the weirdest food combo that you secretly like?
13. Why do you (or don’t you) believe in God?
14. Have you ever committed a crime?
15. How do you feel about the carceral system?
16. How do you want to be buried when you die?
17. Do you have any strong feelings about bachelorette parties?
18. What are all the drugs you would and wouldn’t try?
19. What’s your favorite pair of shoes you ever owned?
20. Do you think anyone really has “deal-breakers” that don’t have exceptions?
21. What are the top five countries you’d want to visit next?
22. Would you rather be able to apparate or use Floo powder? (If they haven’t read Harry Potter, you’ll have to explain.)
23. What’s a movie that everyone loved that you hated?
24. Which style of written laughter do you like best? (Lol, hahah, etc.)
25. Would you do anything differently if you knew you’d live to be 200?
26. What’s your weirdest sex fantasy?
27. What part of your daily routine do you most look forward to?
28. What type of inclement weather do you like best?
29. What type of inclement weather do you fear most?
30. What would you do if you were given a million dollars today and told you had to spend it by tomorrow?
31. Would you ever want to be famous?
32. What is your favorite kind of cheese?
33. Do you prefer books organized by author, genre, or spine color?
34. What’s the best sale purchase you’ve ever made?
35. What’s the best piece of dating advice you’ve ever received?
36. Which word creeps you out?
37. Which Bachelor Nation character is most like you? And least?37. Which Bachelor Nation character is most like you? And least?
38. Do you think other animals hate us for thinking we’re so much better than them?
39. What’s something you’ve lost that you still miss?
40. Have you ever had any recurring dreams? What are they about?
41. What’s one song that always brings you back to a specific time?
42. Do you think it’s possible for people to change?
43. Can you describe the best outfit you’ve ever seen?
44. You’re at a party, and you find out there’s a surprise cake. What flavor would most disappoint you?
45. What’s the worst meal you’ve ever made for yourself?
46. How often do you think about how your organs are just expected to keep running on their own?
47. How old should people be in order to vote?
48. How important are political differences in relationships with friends, family members, and romantic partners for you?
49. What do you like best about me?
50. What do you like best about you?
51. Is there something I could be doing to make you feel safer in this relationship?
52. Are there any activities you’ve always wanted to do with me but never have?
53. If you could be with any celebrity in the world, who would you pick?
54. What’s your love language?
55. What’s your favorite memory we’ve made together as a couple?