Wow! I've spent the better part of a week plodding through this Zimbabwe lensed action-drama that just might be the sappiest tough guy film ever! John Wyman cashes in on his notoriety as a Bond villain in FOR YOUR EYES ONLY (1981) to star as Cliff, a gin-drinking bar owner who has a penchant for being moody and pissing off everyone except his monkey Crap Shot. Trouble falls into his lap twice when, first, Grigg (James Coburn, Jr.) gives him some stolen diamonds before dying and, second, old flame and gambling addict Lisa (Carol Royle) wants Cliff to get her and her wanted husband (John Terry) over the border. What is a histrionic tuxedo warrior to do?
With dreams of THE African QUEEN dancing in their heads, the filmmakers behind TUXEDO WARRIOR seem to have crafted a film from another era that is neatly dressed in 80s fashion. Director-writer Andrew Sinclair is solely to blame for this one as he pens some of the goofiest dialog outside of romance novels. This is what Lisa says to Cliff after they first make love (they are supposed to be madly in love): "You force me and I won't. And you still do and I will! You think you've won, but you haven't. You've lost. You're losing me. For a moment, yes, you got me and I love it. But then it's over and I remember I hate you!"
You had me at, "You force me." Seriously, nearly all of the dialogue is like that. To make things even better, Sinclair stages some unintentionally hilarious scenes as well like when Cliff gets the news (via courier) that Lisa is breaking up with him while in the break room at the dam he is constructing. He flips out and a brawl immediately erupts with everyone in the room before Cliff is subdued by a karate kick throwing co-worker. But this isn't all fun and games. This is serious, serious stuff and not for the weak of heart. Holly Palance (Jack's daughter) shows up for a bit as one of Cliff's jaded ex-lovers and Brit Cliff Twemlow pops up as a raspy voiced bouncer named Chaser.
