Assume the Position

That Quasarfellow makes more videos than China has rice. And this stinker for the prestigious Wicked Pictures label raises once again the question, why him? Why not hire some new blood or assign a talented old-timer to the task.

High-concept is merely to watch beautiful porn women exercise on yoga mats and then get humped by personal trainer guys. No dialog, no story, no nothing, just straight sex and voyeurism like ten thousand other recent videos.

Does Mike Quasar try anything, even the tiniest bit of creativity or affectation, to make this slightly interesting? No.

The five girls dress in nearly identical black and pink outfits, for no reason. Some variety (one has a red-colored bottom piece) would seem natural, but no.

They go through their stretching moves, then pose in regimented sexual positions with the assigned studs, positioning their bodies artificially for the porno camera angles to record explicit sex. Four out of five times it ends in a facial (nobody's perfect).

Only possibility of retaining my attention over the course of 2-1/2 hours of enforced tedium is Vignette #2, shot at the famous "Immoral Proposal" mansion, with Maddy O'Reilly exercising with the trademark oval-paned doors in the background -later serviced by Tyler Nixon.

A complete bust, if you know what I mean. Wicked advertises this for display in the "Couples" section if a video store still existed, but the content and Quasarman's facial emphasis definitely do not constitute couples/romance erotica. File it under Quasarcrap, a voluminous section of the virtual video store.