139 posts tagged with family and children.
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Clean up young adult credit from parent use
How can a young adult clean up a credit record that was damaged by their parent, but without incriminating the parent? A young adult I know has old internet/cable and electricity bills on their credit report that were opened by their parent. Not sure how old, but assume more than five years old. Obvs this is impacting their ability to build and use credit. How can the young adult fix their credit without incriminating their parent? [more inside]
Naming your child after a living relative with cerebral palsy
I recently recalled to my friend that my first name was chosen by one or both of my parents because of a close cousin with cerebral palsy. At the time of my birth, that cousin was still living and was around 10 years old. Our two families were not all that close and saw each other maybe once a year. My friend was horrified at the idea and thought it was awful thing to do to both children. TBH, Id never given it thought as an adult and I just want a second opinion.
What do you think? Is this weird? I can maybe see me being named after this cousin had already passed but isnt it strange to give that honor while the namesake is both alive and still a child themselves? Does it strike you as bizarre or cruel?
Can you help me help Bunny travel the world?
Bunny is a stuffie. He's the reliable companion of a four-year-old, Emily. Sadly but unavoidably, Bunny and Emily will be separated for a little while. Can you help us get through this? [more inside]
Help me get some perspective on a fulfilling life with/without children
I (28) have wanted kids since I first realized I could be a functional enough adult to do a good job . My wife (25) told me about a month ago that she has been doing her best to reconcile herself to being a parent, but she feels now that she will not want to have kids. I'm having a crisis about it, she's not doing so hot either. [more inside]
What is a bathtub solution if we do not want to remodel?
My family recently moved. We have two young children (ages 1 and 3) who share a bathroom upstairs. The bathroom just has a very nice dual shower - no bathtub. Plenty of room for one though. The kids are too young for showers, and our main bathroom downstairs is inconvenient for multiple reasons. We would like to get some kind of portable, semi-temporary, standalone tub for bath-time, but there are so many options and it is hard to tell what you are getting online. [more inside]
What children's TV show am I remembering?
I watched an episode of some cartoon in the mid-nineties. All I remember is that everyone lost their face somehow. This meant that people had a blank area of skin instead of features like eyes and noses. I think the style was similar to Powerpuff Girls, but I couldn't find the episode by googling key words, so not sure if that's the right show. [more inside]
People who've had interfaith marriages:
How have they worked out for you, your partner/children, and the families involved? What have been some of your greatest challenges, rewards or regrets? And what advice would you have to give someone who might be considering going down a similar route?
How to decide if having children is right for us?
How to decide if having children is right for us, after our life plan going off the rails? [more inside]
Advice on family relationship
So my mom & dad were awesome parents up until about age 11. I had an awesome childhood and really good memories, bonded lots with both my mom and dad.
From age 11-17 my mom turned into a narcissistic monster and my dad became spineless. Everyone in the family was severely emotionally abused by my mom, including dad who just watched the whole show unfold and did nothing. She was incredibly cruel and would kill pets by "setting them free", cancelled birthdays & holidays, methodically took away things we loved (toys, tv, sweets, games), burnt all trophies I had, burnt childhood photos, isolated us,...
Needless to say I was absolutely destroyed after this, it's a miracle I made it through high school. Low self-esteem, destroyed identity, no friends/girlfriend, shame & guilt...
She was admitted to a psych clinic and got better, almost "back to normal".
I am 27 and both my parents are nice now and act like nothing happened.
I have worked a lot on myself, got a degree, travelled the world for 2 years, had a gf...
Even now the past still weighs heavy on me. When confronted they will not admit they did anything wrong. My mom thinks she was a great parent.
How does one deal with this? I'm consumed by anger, sadness and frustration.
Stuck living with them because of COVID atm.
Help me lie to a child about magic
Over the last few months my niece has repeatedly expressed the conviction that I know how to do "real magic" and will teach it to her once we're allowed to see each other. Is there a way to handle this that will delight her but not set her up for disappointment in the future? [more inside]
What's the opposite of a biological clock?
I've always thought I wanted children, but over the last several months I've wanted them less and less. I just turned 30. What's going on? [more inside]
To where do your babies trot-trot?
My family is doing the trot-trot rhyme with my neice at our Thanksgiving party, the one that starts, "Trot-trot to Boston, trot-trot to Lynn…" Do people not from Massachusetts do this? If so, do you trot-trot to other towns? [more inside]
Hotel-slash-child-care? Is this a thing?
Is there anything like a hotel with 24hr child care, or child care services that can temporarily accommodate overnight stays? I think I need help sifting through the search results I'm finding relative to some specific details I'll provide below the fold, and perhaps suggestions from parents who have used this sort of service or child care workers who have provided it. [more inside]
I might run out of money paying for a divorce lawyer. How to prepare?
A relative is in a marriage that seems to be on its last legs, despite years of effort at repairing the relationship. It's lawyer time and I'll probably be paying one of the lawyer's fees. But I may run out of money in the course of doing so; what should I do in anticipation of that possibility? [more inside]
Family activities in Amsterdam
We're off to Amsterdam next week. What are some family-friendly (2 adults, a 6y/o, and a 2y/o) activities to do or places to visit? [more inside]
My sister has essentially abandoned her children. What do we do now?
Roughly 10 days ago, after being evicted from her apartment, my sister left her three children in the care of their grandparents (my parents). My sister is a single mother of three kids (aged 11, 8, and 2). She technically has full-custody of all of the kids, although the older two spend two weekends a month with their father. The youngest's father is not in the picture. This is in Texas.
More details beyond the jump... [more inside]
If this is abuse, what are my options?
I'm a man married to a woman, and we have two toddlers. We love each other, and for the most part we have a good relationship. Lately, though, I've come to feel that my wife's behavior is sometimes abusive, and I don't know what to do about it. [more inside]
A problem which threatens to rip my extended family apart...
I'll try to keep this shortish and to the point. My sister is 25 and she's dating a guy who is 27. We have a daughter (3) and my sister and this guy she's dating have routinely looked after my daughter once a week. They've mainly done trips into the city, been to the park. Once or twice they've been swimming or to a play barn. [more inside]
Let me steal your family traditions
I'd really like to start some family traditions in my own family, and I'm thinking I need to be more proactive than just saying they will come naturally. I'd love to steal some of yours. What were your favorite traditions you did as a family when you were a kid? [more inside]
Do you stop bringing your kids over when a couple has marriage trouble?
Parents out there, when you know friends are going through rough times in their relationships, do you deliberately leave the kids and/or spouse at home when you visit? If so, can you help me understand why? I'm trying to figure out whether this is actually a thing or just a thing that's entirely in my head. [more inside]
My girlfriend wants to have a child next year. I'm not sure.
My partner has proposed the idea of having a child next year. I'm unsure about the idea. [more inside]
How normal is this family dynamic?
Every morning now for months I've woken up to bedlam. Our two children, (just about to turn 3 and just about to turn 7) annoying each other and engaging in back and forth pinching, kicking, wrestling, screaming/hissing 'shut up', 'idiot' and 'stupid' at each other? [more inside]
Reading Recommendations: Relationships & Inequality Edition
I'm going down a rabbit hole with my reading lately and am looking for books and articles on the intersection(s) of courtship/love/marriage/child-rearing and economic class/income inequality/educational attainment. [more inside]
Clashes between racist family and partner
The short version: various members of my family are openly, loudly racist. I still want a relationship with my parents, and for my child to have a relationship. This upsets my partner. [more inside]
Virginia family fun for the jaded and beach-weary
I've got an upcoming Sunday to spend somewhere in central or eastern Virginia (or optionally eastern MD/DC), with preschool and school-aged kids in tow. What are some interesting things to do in that area, that also (a) won't be super crowded on a weekend, (b) wouldn't be miserable in hot weather, and (c) aren't just The Beach? [more inside]
Amend/update divorce decree.
You are not my divorce attorney, but perhaps you can
1. recommend one in the Houston, TX area and/or
2. tell me if my plan to request that the court change our existing divorce decree has a reasonable chance of success. [more inside]
Dating and family post-divorce
Finally dipping my toes back in the waters after years of separation and divorce proceedings (see previous AskMe posts ...). I don't need dating tips as such - it seems complicated at this age and stage in my life - what I am really interested in here is what happens if any dating turns into something more serious, and how to bring a partner into an existing household with a kiddo. So: How can I think about introducing any new partner to the current household? Thank you! [more inside]
Away We Go - It's The Final Countdown
We're looking to relocate our family and have narrowed down our options (with the help of Metafilter) to Buenos Aires (Argentina), Toronto (Canada) and Melbourne (Australia). We've done our due diligence with on-line research, but we'd like to hear some personal anecdotes/experiences from people who've lived, worked or traveled to any of the above. [more inside]
Away We Go - Again?
Almost three years ago, we asked for suggestions of family-friendly, queer friendly, and senior friendly locales to set down roots. In light of recent events we'd like to revisit the question, but with a specific focus on areas outside the USA - though if you know of/live in a particularly staunch bastion of of our criteria on our native soil, we'd still like to hear about it! [more inside]
After seperation with child, do you consider ex family still?
I have been seperated, and have lived seperately for 3 months from my ex, we have a 14 month old daughter. Looking through my past questions, it's clear I have a hard time setting and sticking to boundaries, and especially hard now in this instance when I'm trying to co-parent with someone who acts as if we are still together, and tells his family we are, and doesn't really listen or believe me when I say I have nothing left to give or hope for. Am I terrible for feeling as if he is not part of my family and I don't want to be part of his due to the fact that we are seperated now? [more inside]
Should I fight for my relationship for our daughter's sake?
How do you decide what is more important, to fight for your family, or to fight for what you believe in, which may never happen? [more inside]
Good morning, sunshine!
A friend of mine often says that he hates being a parent between 6 and 8 am (and I have to laughingly agree). Getting the children up, getting them dressed in seasonally appropriate clothing, delivering them to the educational institution of choice, dealing with whining and general lack of cooperation... aghhhh, I hate that this neverending struggle sets the tone for the day. So, parents of the Metafilter, what are your tricks, hacks and morning traditions that make your mornings with children great, or at least better?
Extended Family Separation
Advice for surviving my wife's summer internship in another state. [more inside]
Stop a cycle that technically isn't a cycle yet?
How to foster a household that is devoid of physical violence, including threats of violence? [more inside]
My skin can't get much thinner...
I used to have a pretty dark sense of humor, watch crime shows all the time with dead people and blood and guts and really was never bothered by any of this. I've always been a news junky, and I'd read about all sorts of crimes and murder etc. etc. and never be bothered in the least. Since having a baby, I can't even read a news headline about a person being harmed - particularly children. It seems obvious that this is baby related, but will it ever get better? And if not, can I acclimatize myself so I can exist in the world? [more inside]
Awesome Ski Vacation for Family
I'm looking for a awesome ski resort in the U.S. or Canada. My kids are 5 and 7 and have never been skiing. I would love to give them an amazing experience in February. I don't mind paying a premium for awesome lodging / amenities. We would be traveling from Austin Texas. Any recommendations for a kid friendly resort?
Where's My Gift?
What should I do if a close family member neglected to acknowledge my kid's birthday? [more inside]
How to talk to kids about a parent going to prison?
What are some good guidelines for talking to kids about their parent's upcoming prison term? [more inside]
Spacing between second and third child?
We have two girls, currently 3.75 and 7. We are seriously considering a third, and hope to time his or her arrival around the time our younger is 5.5.
How has a larger space between kids or sets of kids worked for you? Did the younger child or children feel a part of the older one's lives? [more inside]
The Cycle Continues
Are my kids forever damaged? Can I teach them to show love? [more inside]
She's going back to the land...
Can the Hive Mind help me in brainstorming the perfect family homestead? [more inside]
Good experience-based gifts for 6yo/2yo children in Seattle/Edmonds
We are friends with a family that has a 6-year-old boy and a 2-year-old girl. I was thinking it might be nice to give them an experience-based gift this year instead of stuff. What are some good things that we can do with them and also take their mom and dad along? [more inside]
Need help figuring out child custody logistics across the border
Long story short, my wife and I are separating and I may try to find work and live in the US (I'm currently in Canada and a Canadian citizen). I'm trying to hear from others who have shared custody of their children where their ex- lives in another country. My situation is across the US/Canada border but I'm interesting in hearing other experiences as well. [more inside]
where to escape the Texas heat with a toddler and infant?
the chirren, wife, and I want to escape the Texas summer heat next year and are trying to think about places we could go. Next summer we'll have a 3.5 yr old, and an 8 month old, and dread another summer (July & August) sweltering in the sun (100/38 daytime highs). I'm tasked with to find the intersection of all our wants/needs [more inside]
Is my sister abusing her husband? How do I help?
My sister is out of control and her behavior is hurting her husband (physically and emotionally) and children (only emotionally). I am not sure how to help anyone in the situation or where to turn for help. Is this none of my business? Do I have a responsibility to step in? [more inside]
Hereditary plate of beans: coping strats for overthinking family.
My overthinking things was making me unhappy... so I cut way back on it, and now I'm enjoying life more. Yay! But now I'm way less tolerant of the same behavior in family and loved ones; trying to ignore it leads to awkward, anxiety-producing silences. Boo. Insert your advice here. [more inside]
Fancy events + no sleep + small children = help?
Family trip coming up, and I need advice on helping my five-year-old daughter manage sleep-deprivation and jetlag. In the context of a wedding weekend, with all the attendant social and behavioral expectations. With bonus similarly-aged relative who brings out her most rambunctious side. What can I do by way of scheduling, boundaries, etc., to keep this sane while still being polite? [more inside]
Good town to visit in Spain in the summer with young kids?
What's a good town or smallish city in Spain to visit in the summer with kids (ages 2 and 5) in tow? We're looking at 3 weeks in late July/August, and would prefer a walkable place that's on a train line (or are they all?) so we wouldn't have to rent a car to explore locally or beyond. [more inside]
How do I insure a newborn on short notice?
We just found out the baby we're having any day now is probably not eligible for medical care at birth on her mother's insurance plan. Help! [more inside]
non-traditional parenting for dummies
What resources exist for non-romantic adult friends thinking about having a kid? [more inside]